Your Social Media Persona Is a Lie

How many times have you sat around looking at social media, feeling down about the life you live? Asking yourself questions like, “why is my life so boring?” Or “why don’t I get invited to parties like this?”

Well I think it’s time we addressed the reality. If you have ever been out to one of these “amazing” events, you see what they are truly like. You look around you and all it is is people turning up for 10 seconds on the Snapchat then going right back to being on their phones. They are doing it ALL for the social media presence, but we don’t see that from the outside. All we see are those 10 seconds from our Snapchat or Instagram, and since we are not there, it makes it look so damn awesome. 

Think about it though, when was there ever a moment that you have truly been having the time of your life and you thought about pulling out your phone and recording it? If you have ever pulled out your phone in one of these situations, then you know it takes you out of the moment. You are no longer taking in all of the beauty around you, instead, you are worried about having a steady camera and getting the best photo for social media. Completely removing you from the moment. And that is all these parties are! No one is truly in the moment. Know for a fact that if you see the party on video or a photo of it, it can’t be that amazing. It’s so subpar that people have the thought to take out their phones and spend some time and energy recording a video. 

This whole social media thing is a lie. I’ve been blessed to go to over 25 major cities in the last year and I have so few photos to show for it. Looking  back at it, I was sort of bummed I didn’t take more, but then I think back and realize why I didn’t. I refused to leave the moment. I wanted to be so present that nothing could take me away from it, and those are the times I think back on best. When I was truly there. Just being one with that moment. No more than a photo or two, then phones away. 

So next time you see some amazing party or event on social media and start feeling shitty, just remember, those party goers had enough free time and energy that they thought to pull out their phones and flex for a minute. How truly amazing do you think that party truly is?

Now go out and live. Don’t worry about what the next person is doing, and do what makes you happy. Not for the camera. Not for your friends. And sure as hell, not for your social media following. 

I hope y’all enjoyed this read, and feel free to reach out with any comments or questions! I’d love to hear from y’all!!




What If You Die Young? But What If You Don’t?

We have no idea what will happen tomorrow, none the less, 5 minutes from now. We are taught to plan for our future and, essentially, live risk-less, but will that truly pay off emotionally?

I’ve seen numerous individuals pass away without living a fulfilled life, and that’s fucked up. I refuse to ever be on my death bed and regret a damn thing in life. Instead, I’m going to live every moment as if I don’t know what tomorrow holds. I’m going to make every decision based off of my happiness, and if I’m truly happy, I believe it will then benefit those around me. No one benefits from being scared and hesitant. We will always be afraid of the unknown, but that’s where change comes from. I’ve never seen someone grow from being comfortable. 

But now, what if you live to see 100? Will you have planned enough to be able to handle life that long? That’s truly where the balance is struck. You must live constantly asking yourself the question, “what if you die young? But what if you don’t?” We must tip toe this fine balance of living for the moment, but preparing a fruitful, long future. As long as we keep that in mind, when our time comes to leave this Earth, we will be able to look back and truly regret nothing. 

So what are you going to change today? Would you truly be content with where your life is at if you died tomorrow? Or would you be filled with regret?

It’s up to you! Now go pursue that truly fulfilling life you dream of!

And if y’all have any questions, comments, or even want to discuss your dreams, leave a comment below! I’d love to hear from you!



Can Alcohol Cause Depression?

I started casually drinking when I was a junior in high school and partied my ass off until I was about a junior in college. Throughout all of this time, I was battling depression. I wasn’t running from it with booze by any stretch. I actually refused to drink when I felt down, so that it didn’t become a vice. But as I decided to really start to battle this depression, I started doing everything in my power to find the root of it. And this is when I drew the correlation between my alcohol use and depression.

 I only started feeling down and depressed as a junior in high school and that’s the same year I started drinking…Somethings adding up. Now that seemed way too easy to me so I wasn’t convinced right away. But as I cut back on my drinking, I would wake up feeling like a had a bit more energy. I didn’t have to work so hard to get up and going emotionally. Get this! Some mornings I even woke up, dare I say it, happy…it was a whole different world. And then when I would drink again, I would wake up feeling like I was emotionally on the sadder, depressed end of the spectrum.

I then got to thinking, “I see this direct correlation in myself, but has anyone else investigated this?” And sure enough… , and this is just one of an abundance of sources…

The more I read about it, the more I realized how real “substance induced depression” is…all my feelings steered me right. It only makes sense though. If we are using a depressant, our body’s natural functions will be “depressed,” our mood included. 

So I encourage you, before turning to any pills or outside sources, unless truly needed, (which if so, I fully support you!) see what you can change in your life. What are your vices and what are they doing to your body?? It makes zero sense to try digging yourself out of a whole in which you are just throwing more dirt…

But believe me when I say this, your life can change. Things can truly get better, as long as you are willing to take these challenges head on and say no to your vices! Try subbing in more healthy vices that you feel good about when you’re done. Personally, I’m a big smoothie fan. When you are going through something and need to clear your mind, go either grab a smoothie and take a walk, or even make yourself one and take a walk. 

Also, watch the foods you eat! There are a bunch of fruits, veggies, nuts, etc. that will push your body in the direction of happiness and healthy hormone releases! Shouts out to blueberries! 

If y’all have questions, concerns, or even just want to talk. Comment below! I would be more than happy to talk to you! 

I hope y’all enjoyed this post, and let me know if there is anything else y’all would like me to write about!

Things can always get better, believe me!!

I love you!


It Takes A Loving Village

Growing up, I would always here angry parents say “it takes a village to raise a child,” essentially when they wanted to bitch at someone else’s child for something they deemed unacceptable, and always hearing this in a negative manner made me despise this saying. To put it simply, these parents really just wanted to be assholes to other kids like they are to their own, but “it takes a village” is so much bigger than that. 

It wasn’t until I got a little older that I realized there is a lot of love and positivity lacking in households and even daily life. You see a lot of kids that aren’t able to be themselves around their parents, or really even express themselves, good or bad, around their parents and that’s so damn worrisome. We must allow kids to be kids, make mistakes, see the repercussions, but at the end of the day, still know they’re loved and valued. We must embrace these children and be the right village there to love and guide them. It is way too easy to get mad and punish children, but what’s not easy, is to constructively love these children, all while guiding them through life. At no point should children or the youth feel like love is conditional. Unfortunately, in many homes, that love is extremely conditional and that is so detrimental to children. 

 In life, we are all going to make mistakes, and the more we realize that, the more effectively we are able to grow, love, and accept accountability. If love is revoked the second our children makes a mistake, they are way more prone to lie and cover up their mistakes. When these mistakes are covered up and ran from, our children will never accept accountability for the mistake, nor analyze how to minimize it happening in the future. This is a cycle that has the potential to hinder our youth all throughout their future. But none of us are flawless. 

We all let anger get the best of us sometimes, and don’t handle situations perfectly immediately. Within the right village, there are other individuals that our children respect and feel loved by that can assure them the love is still there, all while explaining that we can all get caught up in emotions, but the love is still there. Even if the parents handle a situation perfectly, it’s not always the easiest for anyone to tell their parents everything, which is another circumstance in which our children and youth can turn to another member of our right village, and truly confide in them. 
This goes both ways though. We also must be these village members for everyone in our village. To truly progress as a society, we must stand with open arms to the youth of our village and hear them out, love them unconditionally, and guide them when they need. Hear them out, let them talk, and remind them constantly that there are people here who love them. Understand that their thoughts and feelings are valid. They are young, but they are intelligent. They form thoughts, but sometimes may not be able to factor in everything. It’s not our job to change their minds or tell them what to do, but rather to offer up other angles. Let them know there are other options and angles. Just provoke thought and love with open arms. You never realize how far love truly goes…

Now let’s go out everyday with the intention of being there for those around us. Let’s not only love, but listen, guide, and affirm. Let’s let the youth know that they are valuable, worthy, and capable. That they are amazing and loved…
I truly hope you found this piece eye opening, or at least thought provoking! If you have any questions or concerns, comment below! I’m more than happy to talk!



You Can Do Anything You Put You Mind To, On One Condition

You know what the weirdest thing to me is? The separation on the stance ” you can do anything you put your mind to.” You hear some parents tell their children that, you hear other parents tell their children to be “realistic.” Which one is really true? I had t really thought about this until one of my college professors took an extremely strong stance on the side of “you are born to be something. It is not really up to you. You are born with a set of skills and you must utilize that set of skills.” Now this is really when I got thinking. Is it that black and white? Or is there more to it? 

That was four years ago, and I have had some time to really evaluate where I stand on it. And in all honesty, you can literally accomplish just about anything that you put your mind to, but not without the upmost hard work and devotion. And believe me, it will come more natural to some than it will others, but that makes it that much more rewarding when you accomplish it. 

I actually dealt with this exact scenario myself. I’ve never been good at drawing or even looked at artistically, but I decided I wanted to do graphic design. So I set out on a voyage. Every day for 2 years, in between classes, I would head to my university’s library and start watching YouTube tutorials for programs like Adobe Photoshop and Adobe Illuatrator. I had taken one class in high school but that was about the extent of my graphic design knowledge. So for my junior year of school, I started creating hypothetical businesses and creating marketing and promotional pieces for them. This allowed me to put myself in real world situations and come up with something tangible people could actually see. After a serious 4 month learning curve of doing this hypothetical businesses, I finally started to see true progression. I started to actually understand design and become confident in what I brought to the table. 

Come Junior year summer, I set out to find a graphic design internship, and ended up landing one at an electric company, which I would definitely recommend! Especially if it’s just for a summer, because the more change and variation you have, the more you will learn and grow! 

So I complete my internship and go to school for my senior year and continue my hypothetical businesses and start actually doing work for people, through referrals, reaching out on social media, and just having conversations with classmates. This allowed me to actually have graphic design discussions and get a feel for what it was like to work with a client. 

I finally graduated and moved up to Chicago from St Louis to start doing freelance design work. I made a decision that I would at least have a discussion with any potential client, no matter what the opportunity was. This landed me in 2 amazing opportunities…my first opportunity was to be a design coach at chicago’s startup weekend, where a bunch of entrepreneurial minded individuals come together and created a hypothetical business and minimal viable product in a weekend. My job was to coach these individuals on the design of their product and business, and through this startup weekend, I got the opportunity to make some marketing pieces for a big company…

The work was challenging as all hell, and working with big client was unlike anything I had ever done, but I thrived off of the pressure. When it was all said and done, a marketing piece I made ended up on the side of a building in downtown Chicago…

This was so surreal…it was the moment I truly realized you could accomplish anything with the right devotion and drive…you just have to keep laying the groundwork and believe in yourself. Who knows where life will take you…

Keep grinding and do not become discouraged. What separates the successful from the unsuccessful are those who give up when things get tough. You’ve got to be tough on yourself, and work smart, not hard. But that’s for another blog post! 

I hope y’all enjoyed reading this, and if you have any questions or comments, feel free to leave them below! 

Now go out and get it!!



Stop Taking Things So Personal

We have never not seen life through our eyes. Every thought we have and thing we see is through our eyes. Every little thing we have ever experienced influences how we act and think to this day. And beyond that, what we go through each day affects how we go about each interaction throughout the day.

Now think about it, how much does each interaction truly have to do with us? Say you meet someone for the first time and tell them about your ambitions. 9 times out of 10, they will try and talk you out of your ambitions. They will tell you about how competitive the market you’re entering is, or how hard it will be. But let’s be fucking honest. You just met that person…how much do they know about you or your capabilities? They don’t know a single fucking thing about you. So why would they say that to you?? It’s their fear showing. They doubt themselves and don’t believe in what they bring to the table. 

So we have established that it has nothing to truly do with you, but that doesn’t mean it won’t get us down. We MUST constantly remind ourselves that it isn’t about us. Because all of us doubt ourselves at some point, and when we believe someone else doubts us as well, it reaffirms our doubts. 

It is such a vicious cycle, but overcoming it starts with being cognizant of others fears. DO NOT take them personally damnit. Know you are valuable and capable of whatever you truly put your mind to. And continue to sharpen your sword and craft your talent. We can do whatever the fuck we put our minds too. Fear and doubt will not stop us. We will rise in the eye of doubt and prove not only our original doubts wrong, but also everyone else doubting us and themselves. 

The second you overcome your first set of self doubt and other’s doubt, your life will change forever. How little it truly had to do with you becomes so evident, and you’ll never take too much personal again. Rather than take things personally, speak up to those doubting you, and on top of that, encourage others. Make sure your fears and doubts to shine onto others. Even if you have to fake it til you make it, encourage every one you come across. You can never steer someone wrong if you encourage them to pursue their dreams. 

Now remember this every time You find a conversation steering you towards self doubt. Preservere in the face of doubt, and know that you can do whatever you put your mind too…

Now go out and make those dreams happen damnit!

I hope y’all enjoyed reading this post, and I hope it allowed you to see how little it has to do with you, and how much it is really just everyone projecting their fears and self doubt onto you!

Feel free to reach out if y’all have any questions or comments!



If You’re Not Uncomfortable, You’re Not Growing

Nobody likes being uncomfortable. Quite frankly, naturally, being uncomfortable is a terrible feeling. We love knowing what is going to happen next, or what our next step should be. But think about it, do we ever really grow when we are happy, content, and comfortable? I know for a fact that when I’m happy, I just want it to ride out as long as possible. With that being said though, I’ve never grown from being happy, unless I acknowledge the fact that I must keep striving and growing, all while appreciating the progress I’ve made up into that moment. 

So why does pursuing the uncomfortable really make us grow? Because we are entering the unknown. We are expanding our boundaries and knowledge. 

Now believe me, I’ve put myself in some AWKWARD ass situations, from being at a party where I know no one, to accepting design jobs that I wasn’t sure I had the skill set to complete, to camping for two weeks while working SXSW down in Austin TX. Not to mention driving from Chicago to Austin Texas haha. 

So how did they turn out? Honestly, I am who I am today because of those risks I took. I met some amazing people, grew like I never could have imagined, and was part of so many life changing experiences. 

Believe me, this is WAY EASIER said than done, but you have to start somewhere. Start doing things that scare you or make you uncomfortable. Whether that be going out of your way to compliment people in everyday life, not in a creepy way guys, applying for jobs you aren’t sure you could get, or starting to jog everyday. Just get out of your comfort zone. Push yourself! You will see your life change like you never imagined. That is a promise!! Since I have adapted this mindset, my life has been more fulfilling and exciting than I could have ever imagined…

Feel free to reach out with any questions or comments! 

I hope y’all enjoyed this read, and if you so feel inclined, give the ol blog a follow! Ill try and post something every morning to mid day!